The first night of WSOP Main Event coverage has come and gone, and thankfully, Phil Hellmuth was eliminated in record time. ESPN has gone out of their way to make WSOP stand for the World Series of Phil, and frankly, I’m tired of the act. It was more than mildly annoying last year. After a whole year of reruns, circuit events, WPT broadcasts, and lest we forget the worst poker on earth, Celebrity Poker Showdown, the man in the black windbreaker and black hat is making me want to jam a fork in my ear. I like Matusow, love Negreanu, love Phil Ivey, can’t stand Phil Hellmuth. Maybe if he was funny like Matusow and didn’t come off like such a pretentious tool, people wouldn’t be lining up to take his mother out for a nice seafood dinner and never call her again. When I see him at the $1,000 NLHE event next year, I will throw my shoe at him.

In other news, the Tigers now hold a 7-1/2 game lead over the disgusting Chicago White Sox after a 4-0 love-in last night. Ozzie Guillen, for lack of a better term, is a complete douche. That’s all I have to say about that.