Last week, I was rather ill. I started getting a tickle in my throat and a stuffy head on Super Bowl Sunday. I started feeling better on Wednesday, so I went out for a few after work. This was bad idea number one. Friday night and Saturday night I drank fairly heavily and didn’t get much sleep. This was bad idea number two. Saturday and Sunday during the day, I spent the majority of my time standing in the middle of a frozen lake with little more than a pair of jeans, a long sleeve shirt, and a hoodie on. This was bad idea number three. Sunday afternoon, we rode a four-wheeler around on said frozen lake for several hours. This was bad idea number four. These four bad ideas lead up to one evil, evil result. Pneumonia.

For you lucky souls that have never had pneumonia, let’s take a trip, you and I. A little trip through the hell that has been my last few days.

Sunday: After being out on the four-wheeler, I go home and take a warm shower. After the warm shower, I lay down on the couch and start getting the worst chills I’ve ever had. I fall asleep at 9:30 PM.

Monday: I wake for work at 7 completely and utterly exhausted. I force myself to go to work because I think it’s just a hangover, hacking and coughing the whole way so hard I think I’m going to puke blood in the car. After a miserable three and a half hours at work, I drive home, nearly falling asleep several times. I get home at 11:45. I lay down on the couch suffering through said chills with the occassional (fuck, I can NEVER spell that damn word) bout of sweating and relentless coughing. I sleep from 12:15 PM until about 7. I wake up for a couple of hours, drink 4 bottles of water, and fall back asleep around 9 or 930.

Tuesday: Wake up at 6:30 with every intention of trying to drive to work. At 6:31, I decide work is not a good idea. 9:45, I visit the doctor, who tells me I have walking pneumonia. After telling him how much better I feel than the previous couple days, he tells me I had full-blown pneumonia. This explains a lot. He prescribes me some antibiotics, I pick them up, I drive home, I get stuck in my parking lot. My car is resting on the snow with the wheels barely touching the ground. This is not an ideal situation. After my nice new neighbor helps me dig the car out, I immediately go inside and sleep some more.

Wednesday: Back at work, still coughing, still congested, not wanting to waste any more vacation days being sick.

The lesson for today? Don’t ride ATV’s around on frozen lakes in the dead of winter after being sick for a week, because you’re probably going to catch a nice case of the pneumonia. I miss being a teenager when I could be stupid because I was indestructible.