I will be out of town all next week. We leave Sunday for Chicago, then our plane for the Dominican Republic leaves around 6 AM Monday morning, and we return to Chicago Saturday evening. We will be staying at the Riu Bambu in Punta Cana. I will not have my phone, and I don’t plan on checking my voicemail while I’m gone. Please don’t leave me a cutesy fucking message about hoping I’m having a good time and talking to me when I get back. The last thing I’ll want to do is listen to 9306960 fucking voicemails saying the same thing when I get back to this frozen hell.